Shyla Pheasant

con⋅fi⋅dent

Definition: having strong belief or full assurance; sure.

cock⋅y

Definition: arrogant; pertly self-assertive; conceited.

Some key things I’ve noticed when differentiating cocky from confident.

Can they take a joke? When someone is confident they can take a joke with a sense of humor, turn constructive criticism into change, and tasteless stabs into dust.  Cocky people on the other hand, can become very defensive with particular jokes, criticism, and personal stabs; typically they lash out in response.

Who sets whos’ standards? A confident individual sets goals for himself to become a better person.  A cocky individual sets out to “beat someone”, and sets goals pertinent to build themselves up and put others down…. Which leads me into…

Are they a good student? Confident people love to learn. They know that you can always make improvement in your life and aren’t afraid to admit they don’t know everything.  And even if they are very knowledgeable in a particular area, they know that listening to others can bring a new perspective to the table and acknowledge the other person’s value even if they really didn’t learn anything new.  Cocky people usually think they know everything and don’t need improvement.  And some on the very far end of the spectrum might even know that they are wrong, but won’t admit it and instead find ways to justify why they’re right.

Remember, Everyone has insecurities, but not everyone is insecure.  You can have weaknesses without being weak.  Insecurity drives the cocky man, but humility drives the confident man.

cour⋅age

[kur-ij, kuhr-]

Cowgirl/Video Blogging Lessons Learned: Start out small and simple, you have to start somewhere.  If your waiting to try something new because you want to make sure everything is “just right” (the timing, the detail, etc.), you’ll never get around it to.  You can always make things better, and nothing will ever be perfect, so start now and build from there!  And remember, learning experiences stem from both success and failure, so don’t be afraid to make a mistake.  For example… in my  first video.. the lighting isn’t perfect, my hair is kinda of in my face, the shot isn’t “tight”, and I’m sure I could name a million more things…but i did it!  I took that leap off the cliff and faced my fear.  Now it’s not a matter of doing it, but instead working on taking the small steps to improve from here on out.

Quote: “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.”  ~Ambrose Redmoon

Link/Video about failure (mentioned above) at Tina Seelig’s Blog

A couple of days ago, in my series “Cowgirl Lessons Learned”, I talked about responsibility.

Today, as I was thinking on what other character traits I could write about I came up with the idea to explore the topic of accountability.  However, when I first started writing I began thinking, “wait, isn’t accountability and responsbility the same thing?”, and I found myself somewhat confused on the difference of the two and where the line of difference is drawn.  Finally, after thinking on the two words throughout my day, I’ve come to a conclusion.  Accountability and Responsibility are often mistaken to be the same thing, however, they differ in application.

Accountability Definition: the state of being accountable, liable, or answerable.

Responsibility Definition: Something for which one is responsible; a duty, obligation, or burden.

When I’m training a horse for someone, as if that doesn’t entail a lot already, there is the added pressure of “30 days” or “60 days” of time to train that horse.  It has become an accepted time frame in the horse training industry and if you can’t produce in a short period of time you are deemed as 2nd rate to the neighbor down the road, who can do it in a couple of weeks.  Don’t get me wrong, I can train a horse in 30 days and account for all of the training that was asked of me to teach; but does that mean I was responsible and did it the “right way”?… Not necessarily.

Throughout your day, as you complete your tasks, you check them off as you go.  You are being accountable. You know what is expected of you and you can account for all of the duties as completed. But did you rise to the challenge, take the extra time, and/or on the flip side of things, say no to what you knew was wrong and do it the right way? In short, were you responsible?

For instance, in most riding disciplines (reining, western pleasure, trail, etc.) there is a typical trend for horses to have a “low head set”.  In a show ring, where a judge is looking for a relaxed, calm, and smooth team of both horse and rider, a low head means all of the above.  To produce such an outcome takes time.  You can’t build trust between a horse and rider in a day… however, some trainers are pressured into being accountable for this expectation, in 30 to 60 days, and short cuts are taken.  This is an example of being able to say you did the training… accountability… but not responsibly.. because you took shortcuts.  Remember, shortcuts may be satisfying in that moment, but long term, they usually lead to bad habits and a shakey foundation.

Whether you’re at work, in class, or riding your horse, don’t just be accountable for the “to-do” list but responsible, to yourself and others (your boss, your friends, etc.) in how you complete those tasks.

Quote: “Accept accountability in your life because it breeds discipline, but practice responsibility in every accountable thing you do, because your ultimate success depends on the choices you make in the process.” ~Shyla Pheasant

com⋅mit⋅ment

[kuh-mit-muhnt]

Definition: a pledge or promise; obligation.

Cowgirl Lessons Learned: Owning a horse can be a wonderful experience and a lot of fun; but along with that fun comes the responsibility to be committed.  Unlike a motorcycle, or a toy, you can’t just put a horse away and come back to it, days or weeks later, when you want to have fun again. Owning a horse means you have to get up early every morning, and late every night to feed and water them. It doesn’t matter if you’re all dolled up to go out, sick in bed with a deathly flu, or tired from a long day; horses can’t feed or take care of themselves and they depend solely on you.  Just like work, school, and anything else in life, if you aren’t committed to what you’re doing, you aren’t going to obtain great results, if any at all. And most likely you will be letting someone, something and yourself down. What you put in, is what you get out.  If you aren’t willing to put the time in it takes to get a raise, great grades, or a wonderful relationship with your horse; don’t set yourself up for failure, and instead aim for something you can put the time into and apply yourself 100%.

Quote: “There’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permit. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results.”

team⋅work

Definition: cooperative or coordinated effort on the part of a group of persons acting together as a team or in the interests of a common cause.

Cowgirl Lessons Learned: A rider has nothing to ride without a horse… the horse has nothing to do without direction from a rider… simply put, it takes both horse and rider to make a team.  However, once you have assembled that team… it then takes “teamwork” to accomplish a common goal if both the horse and rider want to achieve success.

You can always tell when a horse and rider aren’t on the same page… a horse is a very big animal (for those of you that didn’t already know) and they can be very stubborn sometimes.  Add in the excitement of a first ride after winter, new surroundings, and with  a horse on a bad day, just about anything will do the trick… and you’ll have the rider struggling to get the horse to complete a task without the horse trying to do something totally different.  Now the rider could force the horse to complete a task, but that doesn’t usually work.  One, because of their size, and two, force only leads to resentment and bad habits later on. This can be applied to across the board in many different environments; whether it be a classroom, work, or a relationship. Teamwork can be more than two people but the importance is working as one. It doesn’t matter whether you like the person or not bringing you talents together can help you rise to your best!  Remember, there is no I in TEAM.

Quote: “Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is progress, working together is success.” ~Henry Ford

re⋅spon⋅si⋅bil⋅i⋅ty

Definition: an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.

Cowgirl Lessons Learned: A lot of the times you’ll find that when you’re working with your horse you’ll occasionally reach a wall.  For example, my first year on the Reno Rodeo flag team I couldn’t seem to get my horse, Duncan, to pair off with my partnered horse. During flag team practice, we rehearse splitting off then pairing back up at a lope… well Duncan would split off great, but when it came to pairing back up with our partner he’d resist, and throw is body into the opposite direction.  At first, I was mad at him for making me look like a fool and not doing what I asked him to do… but once I took a second look at the situation I realized I was cueing him incorrectly.  I would get nervous, and without even knowing it, spur him away from the horse instead of into the pair.

It was in that moment that I had to take responsibility for my actions, and realize that it was my fault, not his, and make the change.  Remember to always answer for your own actions.  It’s better to admit you made a mistake, and put the energy into correcting it, than to make a mistake and spend your time covering it up.

Quote: “I believe that every right implies a responsibility; every opportunity, an obligation; every possession, a duty.” ~John D. Rockefeller’Jr.