con⋅fi⋅dent
[kon-fi-duh nt]
Definition: having strong belief or full assurance; sure.
cock⋅y
[kok-ee]
Definition: arrogant; pertly self-assertive; conceited.
Some key things I’ve noticed when differentiating cocky from confident.
Confidence goes hand in hand with morality. When someone is confident, most likely they are integritoues also. I find that when people know that they’re doing the right thing, both when someone is looking and not, that they can stand by what they say in good faith. Confidence is something that has to go hand in hand with “morality”. If you aren’t moral in your actions, how can you be confident? Most of the time people that do drugs, break the law, or do things against their moral judgement do it to compensate for their lack of confidence.
Can they take a joke? When someone is confident they can take a joke with a sense of humor, turn constructive criticism into change, and tasteless stabs into dust. Cocky people on the other hand, can become very defensive with particular jokes, criticism, and personal stabs; typically they lash out in response.
Who sets whos’ standards? A confident individual sets goals for himself to become a better person. A cocky individual sets out to “beat someone”, and sets goals pertinent to build themselves up and put others down…. Which leads me into…
Are they a good student? Confident people love to learn. They know that you can always make improvement in your life and aren’t afraid to admit they don’t know everything. And even if they are very knowledgeable in a particular area, they know that listening to others can bring a new perspective to the table and acknowledge the other person’s value even if they really didn’t learn anything new. Cocky people usually think they know everything and don’t need improvement. And some on the very far end of the spectrum might even know that they are wrong, but won’t admit it and instead find ways to justify why they’re right.
Remember, Everyone has insecurities, but not everyone is insecure. You can have weaknesses without being weak. Insecurity drives the cocky man, but humility drives the confident man.
Shyla ~ Loved this post! This is so very true. AND, there are just as many “cocky” individuals out there as there are “confident” people. This is a good lesson; good teaching for all !!!! I hope y’all are reading this !!!! Makes it more FUN for all to be confident withOUT being cocky. Keep it coming, Shyla! You are the BEST !!!!
Shyla,
I think that this is so true. I work with High School kids and I preach this to them all of the time. You must be confident without being cocky. This really is a virtue!
brianelcano.wordpress.com
Debbie,
Thank you for all of the wonderful feedback. Pretty soon here I’m going to do a post on dedication, or something along those lines, and i was wondering if I could do a video interview with you? Or maybe you could speak about your experiences coaching the cowboys cheerleading team?
Brian,
Good to hear Brian, it sounds like you really are being a great mentor for high school children!
What a wonderful post!